It would be safe to say that any stay-at-home parent with toddlers are the most worn down people on this Earth…and I have two exactly a year and a week apart. I love them with all my heart and some but LAWD do they drive me nuts. I feel like a broken record at times. “Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Sit down and eat. Sit down and eat. Sit down and eat. Stop playing in your juice. Stop playing in your juice. Stop playing in your juice. Stop hitting. Stop hitting. Stop hitting….” All day, everyday. No matter how many times I have ‘the talk’ with them (I keep it severely simple) they still go back and do what I told them not to do. I just want to hide sometimes.
I want to feel like this:
Got it under control
But I end up feeling like this before 10 am rolls around:
Tell me one more time why there is lotion everywhere?
There are some good moments and I try to keep that in the forefront of my mind but when I have to constantly break up fights about one of the kids stealing the others food, those thoughts go right out the window. Even as I type this, I have had to get up out of my seat 4 times just to keep the peace. It’s going to be a looooong day!
I do know that I will take some time to crochet. I like to “zen” out while they tear up the house; only stopping to cook food, give encouragement (which is very important) and deal with the most serious of offenses. By the time I am done, I can clean up after them without much issue. What do you do?
Well I am off to crochet…see y’all later.
God Bless!
Tia's Space 
I am a second time parent now raising my granddaughter. I think that you are completely normal and please try to not stress yourself its a process and a journey. Thank goodness you can be honest about your feelings!!!
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I have to be. I’m separated from my husband and now beginning to realize that it is more than what he’s letting on, trying to keep myself upbeat and attempting to start my own small business. Being a mom is hard work and it’s even harder when you’re alone with no real help.
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haha…I felt a mom for second time but it was MY OWN…had the first 2 when I was 18 and 19 yrs old….and they were the same age every year for 3 weeks…omg…got them raised (almost) and when my second son was almost 17………….I found myself pregnant AGAIN…lol..now they are all ………45 44 and 27………like having 2 families but I lived to talk about it…and ALL BOYS….lol….she will be ok……keep crocheting for sure….my favorite hobby……….
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Very well written. I’m not a parent so I can’t imagine the stress you feel. I was a step parent for a few years and it was a reality check on how hard it is to be a parent.
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Thanks. It is hard. Luckily I found crochet when I did in late February. When I’m stressed from the day, I crochet until midnight or later. By the time I go to bed, I feel much better. Blogging also helps, it keeps my mind active. I’m not that great but I’m getting there!
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I’m right there with you my 2 ( 4yr & 3yr) are 1yr and 9 days apart! Crochet is the only thing that keeps me sane!
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I agree with you 100%. My time is after they go to bed. But when I need it, I do it during the day as well.
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Oh how I can relate! About 30 yrs. ago, I was in your shoes! My two oldest daughters are 1 year and 15 days apart! Their nickname were heckle and jeckle/menace and madness/the peanut butter twins (b/c the used to get into the peanut butter and smear it over everything)/ the nivea sisters (b/c they got into a large bottle of nivea body lotion one afternoon after their baths and YOU know what happened! I still have flashbacks & ptsd from those horrid 4 (yes FOUR) years. Please know that this too shall pass, but in the meantime: enlist the help of EVERY responsible adult in the family/friends circle. If you can join a play group do so ASAP. You need a MOMMY POSSE as of yesterday! And it’s true what the say, one day you will look on these days and laugh, even miss them with a little wistfulness. But you will always give another younger Mom in the same predicament that little, almost imperceptible nod of understanding! You will be in my prayers! May the Mommy Angels help keep you as unfrazzled as possible!
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I wish I could rally some help but the in-laws are not too keen on the idea. Being in a biracial marriage has put up barriers. What help they have given in the past was solely because my husband was still living here. My family is in NY and I’m in NC. I call home often and that helps. Need to make some friends and that’s hard because I don’t have a sitter. So home I stay until I run errands.
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Totally get you! Right now, I have 6 kiddoes (2 are foster children), ranging in age from 12 to 2. The 2 and 3 yr old (1-yr-1-mo apart) are driving me toward insanity. And now that summer is in full swing, the older ones are causing some of those frayed edges to my sanity. Besides, “NO” and “Stop that” and “quit arguing”, the phrase (in its slight variations) repeated today was, “It does not matter what others are doing, you. do. the. right. thing!!!!” I am very tired so I hope I can keep my eyes open to do some crocheting. It is *very* therapeutic and I am also glad that I rediscovered the fun of it a year and a half ago!
I cannot imagine doing it alone. You are an amazing woman and I appreciate the love and effort you put into your family. I know you are a great momma, even on the most frustrating of days. Praying for you as you journey this road. with its many twists and turns and surprises and blessings!~~
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You do the right thing… I tell my son that all the time. He is the oldest and he needs go set the example for his sister. Even though he’s 3 and may not grasp the concept, I still tell him every day. One day it’ll click. Hopefully soon!
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I have two (3 1/2 and just about to turn 2 – they’re 19 months apart.)
I’m at home with them all day in a rural setting, so there’s just me for most of the day. Luckily, my husband is present, and helps, but it’s still just me and them most of the time.
I crochet, sew, knit, etc. for the sheer fact that it lets me FINISH something. The house always seems to be in a state of chaos. I cook, clean, feed, shop for groceries, laundry, repeat. Repeat. Repeat. And it just ends up looking the same. But when I put the last stitch into something…. it’s FINISHED. It’s ACCOMPLISHED!
And it feels GREAT.
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YES! You hit the nail on the head. My house is in a constant state of chaos and I’ve given up trying to keep it “presentable”. There is crayin and pen on the walls, stuff stacked dangerously high out of their reach (they’ve gotten smart and use their chairs to reach things), there are toys everywhere (I do make them pick them up at the end of the day) but when I finish a piece….man, does it feel good. Even better when the person receives it and they’re happy.
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Love your post Shantier and I can so empathize with what you said! Drew is 26-months and Darla turns 4 on Monday. They are into EVERYTHING. They love each other one minute and in the next moment I am trying to separate them so no one gets injured!
Some days I just sit there and watch and wonder what have I gotten myself into? LOL. They are the most loving and loveable Littles 🙂 So full of energy and life.
I am so darn tired sometimes – it is hard to keep up with them on a day-to-day basis. My attempts to ‘wear’ them out with activities – tend to wear me out more than them 😉
Being almost 40 with two little monkeys running about…I often wish I had had them when I was in my twenties!
Crochet is my sanity – it calms me 🙂 and I love being able to make something from nothing – and yes, I agree with what Nancy says – to accomplish something – feels GREAT!
Have a great weekend 🙂
Rhondda
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It’s a roller coaster ride with these two! They are good some times and the other, they are driving me up the wall! Crochet has definitely been my saving grace. Thanks for the kind words. It’s been GREATLY appreciated. You have a great weekend as well Rhondda.
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Thank you everyone for the kind words of encouragement. I did not expect this at all when I posted this and to see everyone chiming in made my day. Thank you all for helping me smile…and almost cry! 😀 The response was overwhelming and I thank God for each and every one of you that read this post.
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Hang in there – it’ll get better. I felt all of that and I only had one at a time! Take the time for yourself as well, and crochet will certainly help with that.
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Thank you. Parenting is hard. Children do not come with a manual. But it is worth it once they’ve grown up. Later I’ll laugh at these moments and when it’s time my children have their own, I’ll have stories to tell.
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